My life has to have meaning, has to have a purpose. That’s why I worked so hard to find mine. And encourage others who are interested in doing the same. But sometimes, there are roadblocks and frustrations and just emptiness. Other times, you have to look back and acknowledge the past in order to move forward. I can’t push things down and pretend they didn’t happen. By giving light to my darkest times, I hope to move forward into a new day. To give meaning to things that seem meaningless.
Or maybe, these are just words on a page.
My mind is a jerk
I am going through some health problems right now and the hardest part isn’t what you might think.
It isn’t the physical pain in certain areas of my body. It isn’t the chronic fatigue or uncertainty of when it will hit. It isn’t even a lack of support. It’s how my brain is processing the information.
It is how my thoughts are processing the information.
Getting off the trauma train
If I didn’t care, if “good enough” was actually good enough, then I could get off the trauma train and live a fairly calm existence. But I don’t want to do that. I want to do better, be better, live better. Not better than anyone else, but better than I have in my past. My past.