3W+3D

This past weekend was hell.

I’m not even sure where to start, but since I think it is medicine related, I will start there.

When I went to the doctor last week, it was a good visit. The rods in my leg look good.

Side note: I almost passed out when I saw the x-ray. My husband and I thought they were putting pins in place. It turns out that they are textured triangular rods, that were pounded into place. I think I’m glad that I didn’t understand that.

Anyway, I was occasionally having a little nausea and dizziness when I walked around, which was attributed to the pain medicine I was taking. I was given a new prescription.

The first day was amazing! I felt better, my mood was better, and everything seemed to be going great! The following day wasn’t as perfect, but I am used to imperfect days, so I didn’t think anything about it. The next day was a little bit worse, but again, I am used to that. With food issues and anxiety issues, my stomach is often off-kilter. Again, that is a very sad normal for me.

By Friday afternoon, I couldn’t stand up without the room spinning. When dinner was brought to me, I could only pick at it. In the middle of the night, I kept feeling the need to throw up. I was sweating profusely, but also freezing.

Saturday morning, even when laying perfectly still, waves of nausea would overcome me. I couldn’t lift my head without throwing up. My mind was swirling. The only thought was that this is it. This is how I die.

Now, that may seem drastic and ridiculous, but have you ever been so sick that you honestly thought that?

I thought that something had happened with the metal rods. Maybe I had an infection of the incision. The word “sepsis” kept screaming in my head.

It felt like there was someone in my room, pacing back and forth at the end of my bed, and that scared me.

My husband thought it was drug withdrawal, from stopping the one medication and starting the other. I couldn’t talk. He went to the store to get Dramamine. If that didn’t help, I would go to the hospital.

It worked.

I spent the entire weekend in bed, going back and forth between sleeping and staring at the walls. My daughter organized my medicines and set alarms. My husband focused on taking care of me and helping me find liquids I could tolerate.

I cried.

When I was able to grab my phone and look up side effects of the medicine, it made complete sense.

Common side effects: Feeling sleepy, dizzy; Nausea or vomiting; Dry mouth; Sweating; Low energy.

Serious side effects: Feel dizzy, tired, and have low energy; Have hallucinations (seeing or hearing things that are not there); Feel confused; Feel very sleepy.

So.. yeah.. pretty sure that was the problem.

Last week at the doctor’s office, I was told I was doing too much. I needed to slow down and just let my body heal. I took that to heart and stopped pushing myself so hard. This was a major surgery, and major surgeries require major time to heal.

But this is ridiculous!

I have had setback after setback after setback! When will it end?

I went into this surgery knowing there was a very high possibility that they will need to do the other side in the near future. After this one heals. But I don’t think I want to. I’ll have to wait and see if all of this is worth it. Maybe it will be. Only time will tell.

Update: I got a call back from the surgeon’s nurse. I was told that the symptoms I had were not side effects of the medication. Even though I looked it up, and Google says that they are. I was told to “suck it up” and wean myself off of the medication. The quotation marks are because that is exactly what she said.

I don’t even know what to think right now.